Submission Edition! This four-eyed boner comes courtesy of Michael.

HISTORIC BONER NO. 12 Dmitri Shostakovich, composer

The Evidence:

And in spite of chronic ill health, several heart attacks, and a late-in-life diagnosis of polio, Shostakovich never gave up his vodka or cigarettes. Such a total old-man, Soviet hipster.

He later died of lung cancer.

Next Time: ??? (it'll be a surprise--to both you and I)